How can I grow out of my abusive past ......... so unlucky in love.?

Sweetie, you will be fine. That is some messed up stuff that happened to you. I wouldn't trust anyone either. But instead of just being stone cold, just be yourself but keep your guard up. If it is Mr. right you will know it. And don't give it all in the beginning, because they will take advantage of you if they see you will just take it. You don't deserve it and you shouldn't cry yourself to sleep at night. Just pray and open your heart to God, he will help you get over this and get through and find the right guy! Good luck!