How do you become 'unattached' to your fiance and live your life instead of 'our' life??? HELP?

If you can not talk to him about the future, and share your goals and dreams, then you have a big problem. Part of being married is sharing each other, for each other. Not losing who you are. Yes there are compromises, there are changes in what you want for your future, but actually giving up yourself and your goals is not healthy. If he is not willing to talk about this at all, and you are doing all the giving, then you need to reexamine why you are in this engagement. If you want freedom and you feel like you no longer have a life..maybe you are just used to him and this has become your norm. When you are with the right person, they add to your life, to your personality and who you are..not take away from it.